


Take Me Down and Make Me Clean

by viklikesfic (v_angelique)



Series: Purify Me In Your Muddiest Waters [3]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: BDSM, Comeplay, Dirty Talk, Dom/sub, Humiliation, Hurt/Comfort, James "Rhodey" Rhodes is a Good Bro, M/M, Past Abuse, Praise Kink, Safeword Use, Safewords, Scent Kink
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-14
Updated: 2020-03-14
Packaged: 2021-02-28 18:46:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23141905
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/v_angelique/pseuds/viklikesfic
Summary: How many dirty, dirty humiliation scenes can you have with a couple before you’re their boyfriend by default? Or: Tony realizes some things.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers/Tony Stark
Series: Purify Me In Your Muddiest Waters [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1592644
Comments: 63
Kudos: 573





	Take Me Down and Make Me Clean

**Author's Note:**

> I was listening to one of my favorite Florence + the Machine songs, “Mother,” and it reminds me so much of Tony in this. “Oh lord won’t you leave me / leave me just like this? Cause I belong to the ground now / I want no more than this.” And: “Every stone in this city keeps reminding me / Can you protect me from what I want? / The love I let in, it left me so lost.” And: “Mother, make me / Make me a big tall tree / So I can shed my leaves and let it blow through me / Mother, make me / Make me a big grey cloud / So I can rain on you things I can't say out loud.” Ugh, it’s so good. 
> 
> CWs: discussion of past abuse, confusion of difference between kink and abuse (cleared up), dissociation

It’s early when Tony wakes up, and he still feels almost stoned from the effects of the previous night, coming to consciousness all groggy and more focused on the sensations in his body than any needs from his mind. That’s unusual enough that it catches him off guard, but before he can panic an arm slips around his waist, low, tugging him back against a broad chest. He can feel Bucky half hard against his ass, and there’s a dull ache there that makes him blush, remembering last night. He must have dozed off in their bed, but some time in the middle of the night he woke again, still fully in subspace, to Steve grinding between his thighs. Steve and Bucky had been kissing, roughly, over his body, and it was easy to just relax into it, let them use him as they saw fit. As Bucky shifts him, now, he can feel the dampness in his hole, on his thighs, and he blushes at the memory of Steve fucking him, half-awake, pulling out mid-orgasm so that he could get Tony even messier with his come.

“Is it wrong of me,” Bucky murmurs in his ear, low and raspy, “that I just want to fuck you to exhaustion and then wrap you up and hide you from the world?” His hand, the metal one, trails down to squeeze Tony’s cock, and he groans softly, trying not to wake Steve.

“Sore,” Tony murmurs, but he can’t quite bring himself to say “no.” Bucky just hums, holds Tony’s cock, and nibbles at his ear. 

“You like that? Hurting a little from Stevie’s dick and mine stretching you out?” Tony whimpers, nods. “Good boy,” Bucky coos. He scoots back a little, making room for his other hand to reach down between them and stroke at Tony’s asshole. Tony bends his knee, lifting it up, to help. “Fuck, you’re so wet,” Bucky moans. “I love that we’re the only ones who’ve come in you. Like… you were made to take it for us. Made just to take our come.”

Tony whimpers, can’t help himself, and Steve rolls lazily to face him, eyes opening as a grin stretches wide. Tony’s cheeks are on fire, he knows it, and his dick is plumping up thick in Bucky’s hand. 

“Morning, comeslut,” Steve offers, and Tony gasps, pressing his face into the pillow like he can hide from Steve.  _ That’s _ an impossibility, he knows it after only a couple of nights with the two of them, but Steve doesn’t call him on it. He clasps his hand over the back of Tony’s neck instead, nice and rough, and lets Tony float on the feeling.

“Buck, I feel like this is going to get to be a problem.”

“What? I really don’t see a problem,” Bucky counters, his fingers swiping through the mess just inside Tony’s hole and trailing it up his spine. The touch is feather-light and he shivers, hips jerking into the firm hold on his cock.

“No? Because I’m honestly not sure I’m ever going to be able to look at Tony again without wanting to get my dick in him. Could have an effect on team dynamics,” Steve teases, loosening his fingers to scratch at the back of Tony’s neck. His tone is fond enough that Tony doesn’t feel a need to contribute to the conversation.

“I mean, valid. But still not a  _ problem _ ,” Bucky argues. His flesh hand leaves Tony’s body, and he whines for a moment in protest, but then Bucky’s shifting on the bed and Tony realizes he’s using that arm to balance as he leans over Tony’s body, the wet sounds of their kissing just above his head. He moans a little, thinks about himself as a sexual convenience for the most talked-about gay couple in New York, and tries to grind his hips somehow to get leverage. He can’t, and that’s almost better.

Maybe five minutes pass, maybe ten. Time seems highly irrelevant. The kissing sounds continue, get more heated, and then the hands leave both his neck and his cock, and they’re dragging him up in between them. 

“Do you  _ like _ that?” Steve asks, his eyes gone cold fire. “You like listening to us? Does it turn you on?” Tony can’t quite keep up with the tonal shift, but the strictness, cruelty almost, makes his dick twitch, and he nods in response. Lightning-quick, before he sees it coming, Steve slaps him across the face. Tony gasps, the sting in his cheek both shocking and arousing, and he licks his lips. Bucky grabs him by the hips from behind, steadying him for the attack before Steve slaps him again. 

“Fuck, you like that too, don’t you?” Steve sounds almost offended, except that his eyes are hungry, and he’s dragging his thumb down Tony’s bottom lip, smearing saliva over his chin before the next slap. “Is there anything that doesn’t turn you on?”

Tony’s not even quite sure how to answer that.  _ Yes _ , technically, but his mouth is open and words aren’t coming out, and apparently Steve doesn’t actually care. He shoves three fingers in, pressing down on Tony’s tongue, and Bucky presses up tight behind him, fingers caressing at his throat. “Good whore,” Bucky whispers in Tony’s ear. “You just give my best guy what he wants.” His voice is low and a little dangerous, and Tony closes his eyes to let the whole scene wash over him. His brain still isn’t fully online from waking up, and when Steve grabs his cock he’s pretty much helpless, whimpering and rocking his hips and gagging a bit as Steve pushes his fingers into Tony’s throat. He comes quickly, making a mess of his stomach, and Steve grins like a cat who got the canary. 

“That’s almost too easy,” he teases, then leans in to kiss Tony like he’s actually something special, and Tony can’t help but melt into Bucky’s arms.

“Hey, I’ve had enough difficult for a lifetime.” Bucky kisses Tony’s neck, just under his ear, and situates Tony’s butt to rest on his thighs, snugging Tony up against his erection. “I’m not saying no to a bit of easy.” 

“Touché.” Steve grins, pets Tony’s cheek, and gets in close, meeting Tony’s eyes. “You know, you’re our favorite bit of easy.” 

Tony can’t really do anything in response to that but blush.

~*~

They hardly leave him alone at all over the next week, and for once Tony can’t bring himself to complain. He still gets work done, does his own thing, but he somehow ends up in their bed more nights than not, and the days even get interrupted by an occasional quickie that he can’t bring himself to fend off. When a Saturday comes around again, he finds himself in their apartment in the middle of the afternoon, lounging on their couch on his stomach as he scrolls through SI data on his tablet. He’s pretty much tuned out anything else happening in the apartment, leaving Steve to whatever he’s doing by the window with his easel and his art supplies. At some point, Bucky comes in, and he vaguely registers it, but doesn’t pick up any of their conversation. So it’s a total shock when Bucky just casually tosses a sweaty gym shirt over Tony’s head, no pause in what he’s saying to Steve. Tony inhales sharply, Bucky’s scent musky and overwhelming in his nostrils, and lets the tablet slide to the side, his body tense in readiness for whatever might happen next. 

Nothing does, for several more minutes. Steve and Bucky are talking about  _ baseball _ , of all things, ignoring him entirely. But then he feels the warmth of another body just over him, and a hand slips in between his hips and the sofa cushion, massaging at his erection. He moans and clenches at the pillow above his head, rocking his hips a little, his senses still flooded with the smell of Bucky. They don’t stop talking, but he stops tracking the conversation. Then they fall silent, and Bucky’s hand disappears. Tony waits, maybe three minutes, before anticipation gets the better of him and he shifts the shirt to see the rest of the room.

Steve has that subtle air of command about him, the way he sometimes does, sitting in an armchair with his thighs casually spread, fully occupying his space. His eyes are hard and focused directly on Tony, like he’s just been staring the entire time. Tony feels the blood rush to his face and he licks his lips, rubbing his lower body just a bit against the cushion. 

“Buck,” Steve calls out, his eyes never straying from Tony. “I think our slut wants you to finish what you started.”

“Well of course he  _ wants _ me to,” Bucky replies when he re-enters the room, thirty seconds later. He’s grinning, posture at ease, shirtless but still in his gym shorts. “You think I should?”

“I think I wouldn’t mind a show.” Steve’s tone is still easy, casual, but the intensity in his eyes draws Tony in. 

“Fair enough,” Bucky agrees, winking at Tony as he walks over to the sofa.

“I also don’t think he needs clothing right now.”

“Yeah? Well, not  _ his _ at least,” Bucky agrees, grabbing his t-shirt again and smothering it into Tony’s face for a long beat before he lets up so Tony can breathe. He’s gasping as Bucky quickly strips him down, then climbs onto the sofa, straddling Tony’s hips. “This good for you?” Bucky teases, grabbing Tony by the back of the neck and hauling him up so that his nose is in Bucky’s armpit. It’s deeply embarrassing, but of course Tony inhales, moaning at the depth of the scent there. Bucky laughs and shifts his grip to the back of Tony’s head, rubbing his face against the coarse, sweaty hairs. “Perv,” he murmurs fondly, grinding into Tony’s lap. He clings to Bucky’s back, holding himself in place, and wonders what Steve’s thinking of all this. It’s hard to multitask, though, and his brain is slipping quickly offline. 

“Dirty little bitch,” Bucky coos, pushing Tony down onto his back and fishing his own cock out of his shorts. Tony opens his mouth without being asked, but instead of Bucky’s dick down his throat he gets Bucky’s balls smashed up against his face, a mix of skin and nylon fabric, the smell here just as intense. He has to fight for air, getting it in desperate little gulps, but he doesn’t care. He pushes his tongue and his lips against Bucky’s skin, feeling lower than low in that way that sparks arousal deep in his belly, as Bucky just grinds against his face. He’s getting curly hairs in his mouth, and there’s saliva all over his face, but he doesn’t care. He thinks of Steve watching this scene, calm and impassive, and his dick twitches and drools precome. Bucky’s thighs are squeezing his ears, so everything tunnels down to the senses of smell and taste, but he has a vague awareness of Bucky jerking his own cock. He keeps going until Bucky starts twitching and coming in his hair. 

“Fuck,” Bucky groans, finally kneeling up and letting Tony take a full breath. “That was so hot.” Tony just blinks up at him, licking his lips, and Bucky laughs. 

“Come here,” Steve demands, his voice low and clearly affected by the scene. Tony shivers, shifting down to the floor when Bucky lets him, more of an awkward fall than anything, his limbs uncoordinated. Above him, Bucky laughs and pets his hair, at least the dry bit at the back. 

“Aww, sweetheart,” Bucky teases. “You’re a bit useless when you don’t have a dick in you, huh?” Tony blushes and nods, crawling across the floor towards Steve. Steve’s eyes go even darker, more intent, so he chalks that up to a win, trying to be as graceful as possible until he arrives at Steve’s chair and kneels between his thighs.

“Get my cock out,” Steve orders, and Tony reaches up for his fly with shaking hands. It’s a series of tight clasps, and he’s a bit mortified to realize, on the third try, that he’s not quite coordinated enough to manage. He looks up at Steve, hopeful if embarrassed, and Steve just laughs, petting his hair. “Wow. For someone so smart, you’re kind of dumb about some things, aren’t you?” 

“Yeah,” Bucky laughs, closer than Tony realized, behind him. “We somehow found a genius with no common sense at all, Stevie. But don’t blame him for being cock hungry,” he coos, reaching around Tony to undo the flies himself and feeding Tony Steve’s dick. They joke some more above him as he sucks, his body operating on autopilot, but he feels like he’s floating, and not in the same way as before. Everything goes kind of blank, the taste of Steve’s cock in his mouth almost dull, and he feels like he’s in a small, dark room without input. It’s only when Bucky’s hand comes around to squeeze at his cock that he realizes he’s lost his erection. 

“Wait,” he hears as if through cotton balls stuffed in his ears. “Hang on, Stevie, yellow.” Tony doesn’t really process the words, but Steve’s dick slips out of his mouth, and Bucky’s fingers are very gentle, rubbing his jaw. 

“Hey. Hey, sweetheart, can you come back to me?” Steve asks, leaning forward, cupping Tony’s face in his hands. He’s so abruptly gentle that Tony starts to mentally come back to the room, only then realizing he’d left. He blinks a few times, then focuses on Steve, on the hands on his cheeks and the arms around him from behind. 

“Steve,” he mumbles, and then feels a rush of embarrassment. “Sorry. Sorry, we can… you don’t have to stop.”

“No.” It’s the softest way he’s ever heard the familiar word spoken, and Steve tugs him up into the chair instead, Bucky helping, until he’s arranged sideways across Steve’s lap and tucked up small. Bucky sits on the floor, which maybe should be weird, but he’s petting Tony’s legs, and they both look so concerned.

“I didn’t mean…”

“Shh. I know,” Steve interrupts, pressing two gentle fingers to his lips. “You didn’t do anything wrong, Tony. You’re perfect. We just need to collect some data,” he explains, reassuring, and that’s a simple enough statement, familiar enough, that Tony clings to it.

“Okay.”

“Tell me how you feel right now, in your body. And how you felt just a moment ago, if you can remember.”

“I… kind of… cold? Numb,” Tony evaluates. “But this is helping,” he adds, snuggling into Steve.

“Good,” Steve smiles, kissing his cheek. “Perfect. What else?”

“I’m not sure,” Tony admits. “I felt… dull. Blank. I think… I lost track. It happens sometimes,” he admits. Though he’s not accustomed to analyzing it afterward or even really  _ remembering _ the experience, he realizes that the lack of sensation he just felt is familiar from previous scenes and the bottom drops out from underneath him. “Fuck. It happened,” he mutters, realizing he was  _ right _ , as much as he didn’t want to be, about this being too good to be true. He dissociated with them, during sex, like they’re just a couple of the johns he picks up when he needs to get a fix of his kink. There’s nothing different about this. He hasn’t actually found some magical healthy alternative to his fucked-up life, has he? But Steve doesn’t seem bothered, just squeezes him tighter and then goes back to stroking his back.

“It’s okay. You told us about this, remember? We knew it would probably happen sometimes. And we consented to play with you, because we wanted to, and we still want to.” Steve’s still so calm, so soft, like he’s talking to a child almost, and Tony feels deeply ashamed but also can’t help but be comforted by it. 

“You told me your dick would go soft sometimes, with her. So I knew to look for that as a sign,” Bucky explains, his voice gone a little gruff, but also softer like Steve’s. “That was good data.”

“I didn’t want it to happen,” Tony mumbles, feeling the loss acutely in his chest. “With you.”

“I know, sweetheart. But it’s okay,” Steve repeats. “We’re here. We’re not going anywhere. Feeling this way doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with what we’re doing, just that your body needed to warn you away from something specific that was happening.” He presses a soft kiss to Tony’s mouth, and keeps petting him for a long while before he shifts a bit. Tony can’t quite process the words, the promise, but it’s hard not to relax into the touch anyway. “Are you up for a shower?” Steve suggests. “And then maybe we can talk about what triggered you?”

“I guess,” Tony agrees. The shower sounds awesome, the talking less so. But he lets them lead him to the shower, where they scrub the come out of his hair and gently wash the rest of his body. Once they’re all clean and dry, they put him in too-big but also wonderfully soft pyjamas, sitting him in the center of the bed where they can cuddle up on either side under the blankets. He wants to say that he’s not a child, that he doesn’t need this, but it’s also undeniably comforting. He wants to believe that it’s not all over, even if he doesn’t trust it. 

“Do you think you can pinpoint what went wrong?” Steve offers. “Or do you need help?” 

Tony closes his eyes, rests his head on Steve’s chest so he doesn’t have to look at them as he explains. “I think… I felt stupid,” he admits, mumbling a bit. “You said… well at first I just felt fuck-dumb. Like… I need dick. You made me feel like I just needed dick.” He blushes, but talking helps to sort it out in his mind, so he barrels on. “But then… I couldn’t do it. Your pants… I couldn’t figure it out. And then you thought I was dumb and useless. Really stupid,” he spits out, angry at himself. He starts to say more, but Bucky interrupts, a hand on his back.

“No… no, sweetheart. We didn’t think that at all. We were teasing you because we thought you would like it, in the scene. You’re fucking brilliant, we know that.”

“But… not at everything,” Tony protests, frowning. “Not… at obvious things.” 

“You were really deep in your head, Tony,” Steve offers, stroking his hair. “Anybody would be a little uncoordinated. We just… well I, I’ll speak for myself, I started it. I remembered what you said about nerd being okay as an insult, and that you like it when people aren’t really impressed by your smarts. I was trying to play to that, but obviously I went too far. We both did. In your head that was… a little too close to the stuff you don’t like, wasn’t it? You felt like we were disappointed?”

Tony nods, still hiding his face, trying not to cling too hard to Steve but probably failing. He wants to just leave the room and never come back, but then he also wants to plant himself in their bed and never leave. He feels so fucked up, but at the same time, can’t really deny their comfort. They’re acting like this can still be a thing, like he hasn’t irreparably damaged it, and he wants so badly to believe that.

“We didn’t want to make you feel that way,” Bucky murmurs, kissing his hair. “We’re sorry.”

“We never should’ve played so close to that line, without understanding it better,” Steve adds. “Do you think you could help us, though, maybe? To understand? Only if you’re ready to talk about it.”

“I don’t think I’ll ever be ready to talk about it,” Tony admits, quiet. He feels damaged, like they’re never going to be able to play with him without walking on eggshells. He’s never going to be  _ more _ ready, though, so he plows on, fisting at the sheets to steady himself. “She used to make me feel so ashamed. I was… never very good in bed. With her. I was young, but…” He shrugs, thinking back to that time. “She told me all the other girls I’d been with were kind of idiots, that they were too young to know better. I’d never realized that they might have been faking it, you know? And she was older… she explained that girls will do a lot for a guy with a big checkbook. I felt so stupid.”

“You’re not,” Bucky murmurs, stroking down his back in long, firm movements. “You weren’t. Just inexperienced.”

“Or she was lying out of her ass,” Steve grumbles, sounding angry. Tony pushes forward, knowing he’ll never be able to explain if he lets Steve distract him. 

“I don’t know if it was true… I really was kind of limited in what I knew about getting girls off, but... it doesn’t really matter. She just… I mean, she introduced me to feminist ideas. I’m still thankful for that. I got some of that from my mom, but it’s not like we ever talked about  _ sex _ .” He makes a face against Steve’s chest at even the thought of discussing sex with his mother, God rest her soul. “Sunset gave me things to read, helped me understand power dynamics between men and women and how that plays out in bed… I guess I just felt dumb. Like… I was this dumb guy born with a silver spoon in his mouth, and women like her had to work ten times as hard and were ten times as smart… I still think some of it’s true, but… I don’t think she needed to make me feel the way she did. She liked this image of me, the idiot man to her brilliant goddess…” He’s able to roll his eyes a bit, at that, shifting so that they can see his face again. “It was important to her that I believed it. And I guess… when I realized she had gone too far, it was already kind of engrained. I tried so hard to be good in bed, to please her, and I was always disappointing, not good enough.... even though she turned out to be abusive, that doesn’t just automatically mean I  _ was _ good enough for her, right? I always thought that someone better might come along, someone older, and I was so infatuated with her back then…” Tony sighs. “I sound like an idiot, don’t I?”

“No,” Steve disagrees. “You sound like you were young and in love, and probably vulnerable at that age to the kind of manipulation she was offering.”

Tony snorts. “No kidding. My shrink could tell you that. Daddy issues, etc. etc.”

“Howard?” Steve frowns.

“Yeah, well. I know he was your BFF and all, but…”

“Not really,” Steve interrupts, ruffling Tony’s hair. “Buck liked him more.”

“I liked his cars,” Bucky admits, unrepentant. “I didn’t know the man well. Go on, Tony.”

“Well, you met him, at least. He was kind of an icon. I spent a lot of my life trying to stop disappointing him, to do better, to build better things…” Tony sighs, shrugging off the thought. He knows all the psychobabble, but still hates that he could be victim to such  _ obvious _ family trauma, to a pattern that should’ve been easy to spot even as a child. “Whatever. Classic shit, you know, he was either trying to motivate me or he was jealous, I’ll never know, and then apparently I projected the whole thing onto my girlfriend, because I was born to be a therapist’s wet dream, or something. Is that enough data for you?” 

He’s growling, a little, can’t help himself, but neither man rises to the bait. Steve shifts down, kisses him, and keeps kissing him till he softens into it. Only then does Steve pull back and speak. “Thank you for telling us. I’m sorry I made you feel that way.”

“You didn’t mean to.” 

“Still,” Bucky agrees. “I’m sorry, too. For what it’s worth, you’re the most impressive guy I’ve ever met.”

Tony wants not to be affected by it, to shrug it off, to not think about the fact that Howard’s included in that pool. But he’s only human, and so he doesn’t say anything. He just snuggles down between them and lets the discomfort get lost among their bodies.

~*~

“I am a fucking idiot. JARVIS, I am a  _ fucking idiot _ .”

“All evidence suggests the contrary, Sir.”

“Yeah, well, I’m not talking about  _ science _ ,” Tony growls, throwing a random wrench at the wall. Dum-E wheels back a few feet in alarm. 

“I’m quite sure Sergeant Barnes and Captain Rogers would also disagree with you, in matters not pertaining to science.”

“Right, because they’re fucking looney tunes, and they want to keep banging a  _ nutcase _ .”

“If you’re trying to bait me into providing evidence of your sanity, Sir, I would remind you that…”

“Okay, okay,” Tony groans, dropping into a chair and letting his head fall back, scrubbing at his face. “The  _ point _ is, they know  _ everything _ . J, they know literally everything.”

“In fact…”

“...everything pertaining to the subject, you non-corporeal ass.” Tony sighs, spinning in a lazy circle in his chair. “There’s no ‘undo’ button. They’ve seen…  _ fuck _ . Everything,” he repeats. “Not just the embarrassing kink files, but we talked about  _ Howard. _ And I’m just… letting myself indulge in this shit. With  _ Steve Rogers  _ and  _ Bucky Barnes. _ I am so fucked.”

“Or perhaps you are finding yourself in a uniquely vulnerable situation with two men to whom you are deeply attracted,” JARVIS reasons. “And you are experiencing fear of the unknown. For what it might be worth, I have substantial evidence to suggest that Sergeant Barnes and Captain Rogers are similarly attracted to you, and that they are competent in dealing with significant obstacles.”

“Yeah. Right. Tony Stark: significant obstacle.” He sighs deeply, plants his feet, and slaps his hands on his thighs. “All right, JARVIS, back to work.  _ Physical Graffiti _ , crank it all the way up.”

~*~

Tony doesn’t stop sleeping with them. He’s only human, and they’re really,  _ really _ good in bed. He still freaks out sometimes, but only alone, and they always make him forget for a while, with the way they talk both sweet and so, so dirty to him. And then Rhodey’s in town, and Bucky suggests the four of them have dinner, and Steve talks up Bucky’s newfound cooking skills until Tony says yes just to shut him up.

Bucky  _ is _ a good cook. But also a manipulative little shit, Tony realizes halfway through the evening. 

“So, Colonel, I was wondering if we could talk to you about something specific.”

“Sure,” Rhodey agrees easily, leaning back in his chair. “What’s up?”

“You’ve known Tony for a while,” Steve says, and then reaches over to take Tony’s hand on top of the table, like it’s perfectly normal. Tony blinks, and Rhodey stares for a moment, but to his credit, doesn’t ask.

“Yeah. Since he was 16,” Rhodey clarifies. “You asking me to reveal the skeletons in the closet, Cap?” He raises his eyebrows, but Steve just smiles. 

“Not reveal, exactly. More like… clarify some things.”

“Wait. Hang on.” Tony frowns, cocking his head to the side. “What’s going on?”

“We don’t have to talk about it if it’s really going to bother you, Tony.” Steve squeezes his hand, reassurance in his eyes. “But there are obviously some misunderstandings about the whole thing, and Rhodey ought to know about them. We wouldn’t be doing right by you as your partners if we didn’t at least try to straighten it out.”

“Wait, hold up,” Tony interrupts, staring at Steve and then shifting his eyes to Bucky, who doesn’t look any less calm about the bomb Steve doesn’t appear to have realized he’s dropped. “Could we go back a bit?  _ Partners _ ?”

Steve smiles, a bit sheepish. “Well… yeah. I mean, you’re  _ ours _ , so… that’s the word people use nowadays, isn’t it?”

“Oh no,” Rhodey interjects, looking like he might be about to crack up laughing. “You don’t get to play the ‘ignorant geezer’ card, Cap. Seriously?! I was about to ask why you didn’t tell me you were dating them, Tones, but it sounds like  _ you didn’t know _ .” Rhodey does laugh, then, shaking his head fondly. “You two are just about as terrible at talking about your feelings as Tony is, aren’t you? Maybe you deserve each other.”

“Seriously?” Tony asks, still kind of stuck back on Steve’s wording. “You want… I mean you want me… like that?” 

“Yes,” Steve says simply.

“We want you in all the ways we can have you, doll,” Bucky agrees, but he’s not leering as he says it, just giving Tony a very genuine look that he can’t really take in for more than a second before he stares back down at his plate.

“Holy shit,” Tony mutters. He’s silent for a long minute before Rhodey clears his throat.

“This is the part where you tell them if you’re cool with that, Tones.”

“Uh…” Tony frowns, looking up between the two of them. “Does this mean I have to remember birthdays? Or go to the ballet?” 

“Ballet? Really?” Bucky looks skeptical, and Steve just laughs.

“No, Tony, it doesn’t have to mean anything that we don’t want it to mean. We just want to be with you. The same way we are with each other.”

“Well… not  _ exactly _ the same way,” Bucky corrects with a little smirk that probably made  _ all _ the panties drop back in 1937. Rhodey groans and sticks his fingers in his ears. Tony just laughs and leans over to kiss him, then Steve. 

“Then… yes. I want that,” Tony decides. “Until you get sick of me, at least. Now this is where we skip the serious conversation time and kick Rhodey out so I can take you both to bed, right?” he suggests hopefully. 

“Nice try.” Steve makes a hand gesture at Rhodey and he uncovers his ears. “Sorry about that. We… really thought he knew.”

“You’re both idiots. All three of you, actually.”

“Possibly true,” Steve concedes. “But we’ve got bigger fish to fry.”

“Sunset Bain,” Bucky clarifies, and Rhodey’s expression goes dark. Tony wonders if he should be concerned that Bucky somehow knows her last name.

“I think I’m bound by the military code to advise you not to murder her,” Rhodey says, though it’s very dry, and not very sincere. Bucky’s smile is wicked, and it’s Steve who has to get them back on track.

“Trust me, we’re not fans, either, but we wanted to talk about something more specific. We have the impression that some of what you told Tony, back when he was going through getting away from her, might have been based on incomplete information.” 

“Okay...” Rhodey frowns. “If you’re saying she’s  _ not _ an abusive bitch, though, I’m gonna have to disagree.”

“No one’s saying she wasn’t abusive towards Tony,” Steve promises. “But I think you might have been… overbroad in your advice.”

“Let’s start here,” Bucky suggests. “Do you know much about kinky sex? BDSM, that kind of thing?”

“Jesus,” Tony groans, burying his face in one hand. 

“Not a  _ lot _ ,” Rhodey replies. “The basics, I guess. Does this have to do with the weird shit they did in bed? Because I didn’t actually ask a lot of questions about that. I mean, I had an inkling, that was enough.”

“Well, yes and no.” Steve squeezes Tony’s hand and he reluctantly uncovers his eyes. “What she did to him was abusive, no question. But Tony got the impression, from all of that, that his kink for humiliation is dangerous on its own. Unhealthy.” 

“His… kink for humiliation?” Rhodey raises an eyebrow, and now Tony  _ definitely _ wants to hide under the table. “You mean the rude-ass guys you fuck sometimes? Cause we  _ have _ talked about that.”

“Yeah,” Tony mumbles, feeling about two feet tall.

“It’s not just about liking guys who are bad news,” Bucky interjects, his tone a bit gruff. “It’s about… needing a particular kind of dynamic in bed, and sometimes that goes along with assholes, but it doesn’t have to. Sunset fucked with him. I’m pretty sure most, if not all of those other guys took advantage of that, because he didn’t know how to play kinky with boundaries and limits, but he did need it. He thought the only way to get what he needed was through… well. We’re not saying the sex he’s been having is healthy.”

“But when we started sleeping with him, he believed that wanting to be humiliated, on its own, is unhealthy,” Steve continues, his demeanor so clear and confident that even Tony wants to listen to him, despite the embarrassing nature of what he’s saying. “So he didn’t look for something different because he didn’t know it was available. Or maybe he knew about kinky sex, but didn’t know that his own desires could fit into that framework. And then he was spiraling back into those shitty partners because he didn’t realize he could get his needs met and also be cared for in a relationship.”

“So… let me get this straight. You’re saying Tony actually  _ likes _ being humiliated? Not just… as some fucked-up side effect of the abuse? Because she did a number on him, you have no idea…”

“We have some idea,” Bucky says. “But he knew what he wanted before her. And it’s a pretty common kink. It doesn’t have to be unhealthy.” 

“We’re not trying to make you uncomfortable, Tony. We just want Colonel Rhodes to be able to spot the difference… so you can do what makes you feel good, but if we ever mistreat you, if anyone ever mistreats you, he can see it.” 

“Wait, are you… is this some kind of  _ reverse _ shovel talk?”

“What’s a shovel talk?” Bucky frowns.

Rhodey just laughs, and Tony doesn’t explain. “Only Captain America…” Rhodey mutters, and then Tony’s cracking up, too.

“All right, all right,” Rhodey concedes once they’ve calmed down. “Maybe you can explain some more? Preferably without the gorey details,” he adds, making a face. “But school me on the basics of this kink thing. I mean… humiliating someone you’re supposed to love looks like abuse to me, so what’s the difference?”

“Mainly motivation,” Steve offers. “It’s pretty obvious to us that Sunset didn’t do the kind of play Tony’s wired for because she wanted to care for him and give him what he needed. I think she got off on making him feel small, because she liked him feeling small, end of story. Whereas we like it, and some other people like it, because it turns their partner on. Not sure I can tell you  _ why _ without being explicit, but... humiliation play isn’t harmful, in the right context. It’s like… some people like to be spanked, y’know? Or they like to call their partner ‘sir’ or ‘ma’am.’ And if they’re adults and they enjoy it, nobody in this century cares.”

“Well,” Rhodey smiles a little. “I wouldn’t say  _ nobody _ … but I take your point. When you do it, you don’t really mean it, is that the idea?”

“Not exactly, but… we don’t mean to harm Tony. We don’t think he’s less than us, or that he deserves abuse, anything like that. It’s… a different way of taking care of a person than what you’re used to. We get things out of it that have to do with our own desires, sure, but bottom line: if he wants us to stop, we stop. If we see that something’s harming him, we stop and talk about it. I don’t get the impression that’s how it was, with her.”

“Me either,” Rhodey agrees, taking a sip from his beer bottle. Tony frowns, slipping back into the conversation.

“Maybe at the beginning, though. I mean… she really  _ didn’t _ have any experience with… it. Before me.”

“Sure,” Bucky agrees easily. “But that doesn’t mean she didn’t have harmful intent going in. I don’t know, I don’t buy this idea that she was fine at first and it got out of hand. The fact that she didn’t share your kink doesn’t mean she wouldn’t have manipulated and abused you some other way. Just like we think the stuff you like is hot, but it’s not  _ why _ we’re with you. We’ve always found you attractive, I’m sure we would’ve taken another opening if it came up.”

“Sorry… what?” Tony blinks, and Bucky laughs a little, reaching out to squeeze his thigh.

“You have no idea, do you, doll?” Bucky winks, and Tony blushes a little, his eyes flicking down to his lap. 

“Jim, I have a question, if you don’t mind,” Steve says.

“Go ahead.”

“When Tony told us about what happened… we get the impression that Tony sees things as him bringing on the abuse, inviting it because of what he likes. He mentioned your name, like you’d back him up on that.”

Rhodey frowns, catching Tony’s eye across the table. “Tones?”

“Well… you always tell me,” Tony reasons, feeling a bit uncomfortable and wrapping his arms around his torso protectively, letting Steve’s hand drop. “Not to go back to it.”

“Not to go back to assholes,” Rhodey agrees. “People who treat you like shit. But I never said Sunset was your  _ fault, _ Jesus.”

“Didn’t you?” Tony frowns. “When I told you about it. You agreed with me. You said it was sick.”

“Yeah, what she did to you was sick. She fucked you up, she made you feel like you were trash, she literally made you sick to your stomach. I didn’t know it was all wrapped up in this kink thing, you never told me that… I just thought she’d messed with your head and made you think you liked being abused, and that’s why you kept hooking up with these shady fucks. Look, I don’t know much about what it means to have a humiliation kink, it seems like it could get sketchy fast, but… I don’t think that there’s anything you could  _ like _ that would justify what she did to you. Hey,” Rhodey adds, softer, knocking his knuckles on the table so that Tony drags his gaze back up to meet Rhodey’s. “When you do whatever you do, with these guys, does it make you feel sick to your stomach?” Tony shakes his head. “And the guys you used to hook up with… when you’d call me, feeling guilty, what about them?”

“Sometimes,” Tony admits. “Not… all the time. Not the whole time, or I wouldn’t… but sometimes.”

“Then there’s obviously a difference.” Rhodey’s voice is firm, self-assured, and it’s hard not to listen to him when he’s like that. “I may not really get it, but I can see that. I guess you just… didn’t know, really. That there were options. I didn’t either, I… look, I’m sorry I made you feel like any of that shit was your fault, man, I just… wanted you to be okay. Wanted you with the right people.”

“Aw, Platypus.” Tony can’t help but smile, and he pushes back from the table to walk around it to Rhodey’s side, plopping into his best friend’s lap as Rhodey grumbles good naturedly and accepts a wet kiss on the cheek.  “All right, all right. I don’t know where that mouth has been…” Rhodey mock-protests, shoving Tony’s head away but not displacing him from his lap. 

“So are we good?” Bucky asks. “We want you in our corner. Keeping him safe.” Rhodey nods, and Tony groans a little.

“I’m a grown-ass adult, you know.”

“Yeah, and your grown ass can take all the help it can get.”

“When you say there are options,” Steve interjects, before they dissolve into their usual playfighting banter. “You should know that there are. For Tony, I mean. I know the bar was really low with her, and you didn’t know what playing was supposed to feel like, Tony, but we want to help you with that. Hopefully… if you have a better idea, with us, then you can use that. If you ever want to go your own way…” Steve shrugs. “You won’t think that getting your needs met just means putting up with a shitty relationship, anymore. And Jim can remind you.”

“Jeez,” Tony grumbles, laughing it off because he doesn’t want to dig too deep into the emotional center of what that offer brings up for him, “just told me you wanna date and now you’re already looking for an escape clause?”

“No,” Bucky half-growls, stopping Tony’s mental spiral in its tracks. “That’s not what he said. If you  _ want _ to leave, doll, the door is always open. We never want you to feel trapped with us.”

“But we do want you to stay. For a long time, hopefully,” Steve adds, reaching out to give Tony’s cheek a firm little caress.

“All right, well, that’s adorable, and also my cue to go to the guest suite,” Rhodey announces, pushing up to his feet so that Tony awkwardly stumbles out of his lap, catching himself on the table. “Thanks for dinner, Barnes. Be good, Tony.”

“Hmph.” 

“He always is,” Steve says, and Tony turns away just in time so that no one catches the bright flare of pleasure in his cheeks. If they want to see him blush, well, there’s plenty of that to go around for later.

**Author's Note:**

> I do have more ideas for this series but they are, like, all porn. Possibly I should locate some plot?


End file.
